How Can I Get My Boyfriend to SERIOUSLY Understand That It’s “drugs” or “me”?

Question by Chloe: How can I get my boyfriend to SERIOUSLY understand that it’s “drugs” or “me”?
First of all, this is a tad long so if you get bored reading long questions, I would stop here. I just need to give some background.

We are both Heroin addicts. I’ve been on the Methadone program for 2 years now and was doing quite well. Methadone (sometimes called a legal heroin substitute but it doesn’t get you high at proper doses) keeps you from going through withdrawl and blocks the effects of heroin and other opiates if you do use. However, I’ve started detoxing. I didn’t feel sick or anything because it’s a slow detox. The problem is that my dose is low enough now that I can get “high” off of opiates like Heroin. Metadone usually blocks the euphoric effects when at a proper dose. I can NOT go back up on my dose at this point in detox but I can maintain my current dose and stop detoxing.

The problem is that my boyfriend will NOT get help and is in denial he has a major problem. He thinks he can use Heroin “occasionaly” (any Heroin addict knows that’s a joke) like on the weekends. Since I know he can “score”, I asked him to get me some. I’ve done it now about 5 times in the past week and this is the first time in two years. Now, I want to do it again and I actually even feel a bit dope sick.
I’m going to be put on probation from an arrest about a year ago in a month. This will be a probation that I WILL be required to be drug-tested. I will NOT risk going to jail by using. Therefore, I can’t have the “temptation” around me which includes my boyfriend if he’s using!
I know it’s easy to just say “Dump the guy, he’s just bringing you down” but it’s SO NOT THAT EASY! We’ve been dating for 9 years! I love him so much even after some of the pure hell we’ve gone through together.
I’ve given him the ultimatum of “DRUGS OR ME” before but he doesn’t take me seriously. Of course, me doing drugs with him isn’t exactly showing him how serious I am. He needs help really bad too. He also has some major legal problems so he will have to quit too.
How can I get him to UNDERSTAND just now how his using is jepordizing our relationship but even more importantly, his life?
IT’S LIKE HE THINKS IT’S ALL A JOKE. He is constantly telling his best buddy (whose a user as well) what a nag I am and cutting down on me. He ignores my phone calls when he’s using. He hangs out with other girls that use and I suspect may even be sleeping around although I’ve been told that “HIS OTHER GIRLFRIEND IS HEROIN” by a friend of his. PLEASE HELP!

Best answer:

Answer by TJ
I stopped reading 1/2 of the way through. All I can tell you and anyone else who will listen, I have had 3 friends OD from heroin. I can also tell you I had no idea they were even users. What do you think your future looks like if you continue this lifestyle. I know. Have a great day. Good luck trying to quit also!

Answer by swimmer
ok so i can see u have had some issues and i can tell u want to quit but i honestly think its just so u dont go to jail, n that after that u may go back to doing drugs but if u really want to change n turn your life around then when he is not high then u need to just sit down with him n be like ok i am going to be totally honest with u n u need to take me seriously cuz i no you havent lately. tell him u need to turn your life around n that you need a fresh start and that you cnt be around him cuz he is doing drugs and thats not going to help you get any better just worse and its the last time your going to tell him its you or the drugs and if he doesnt take you seriously or he he chooses drugs then you need to leave him and i no it will be hard for you but if he truley loves you and he wants it to work then you need to leave him and im sure he has probably been there for u thru everything but there comes a time in your life when you need to worry about yourself and make decisions for yourself to make you a better person, i no it will be hard to do but if your going to tell him its you or the drugs then you need to stick to it not just say its u or the drugs n then when he doesnt listen go back and say it again just leave. i hope this helps you